Oh, Sit Down!
Thursday August 11
Yesterday evening the nurse bringing the bedtime painkiller was late and I was in agony by the time I had them, and then it took a while for them to kick in. This led to another terrible night trying to sleep. It’s really hard when you have a bad combination of pain and almost no ability to move. What doesn’t help is that the bed has a plastic sheet under the cotton one. This is presumably to protect the bed if someone has an accident, but also means that when you lie in it all day, you stick to it.
The only other thing worse than trying to sleep is trying to toilet. Not being allowed out of bed means not being able to go to the toilet. That means peeing in bed into a cardboard box. It’s a terrible combination of indignity and discomfort. It has taken several attempts to work out the best method, and even then it’s extremely awkward when you can’t easily contort your body into the position that would give you the best chance to actually do something.
So, it was with some relief (!) that today I am allowed out of bed. In fact, there’s no choice! Well, I’m fine with that. The first tentative moment as I swirl round, agonisingly slowly, to put my feet on the ground. In front of me is a window, with a view of the outside, which I can now see that I am not lying in bed staring at the wall, and directly in front of me is a metal frame for holding onto.
It is a strange sensation the first time my feet hit the ground and I can move, if only tentatively, and in a few moments, I have turned round and sat in a chair. Success!
It means a lot, to be sat in a chair, laptop in front of me, later a cup of tea, later still a meal. It almost feels normal!
Later my sister comes to visit, having brought me some clean clothes, and then supervises me as I walk to the toilet with the help of the walking frame. However, I am only supposed to move around under supervision, so while it’s good I can move, there is still the uncomfortable situation of having to announce to people if I want a trip to the toilet.
